wow i really like this song i think i’m gonna listen to it 1 maybe 60 more times




I say I want to be skinny yet I am always eating. I say I want good grades yet I procrastinate until it’s too late. I say I don’t want to be alone as I put my headphones in and never talk to anyone. I say I want to be a better and happier person as I sit here and count all the ways I hate myself.


I’m stuck between wanting:

1. A long lasting relationship with my soulmate who supports me and protects me and is my partner and we are completely bad ass together and in love

2. Wanting to have casual sex and rip out the heart of everyone person I meet

3. Being independent and having a loyal dog while I’m married to my career


“hey im emotionally unstable and not good at texting do u wanna date me”


every time i try to do smokey eyes



i wish that i could wake up with a boyfriend

and forget about my stupid ugly face

» Survey #129 : 15 sections, 5 questions

[1] you;
1. most people call you?: Chandra
2. when’s your birthday?: December 6th
3. is your current hair color your natural hair color?: No
4. what are you complimented on most?: My hair and  my complexion
5. what do you do for fun?: Tumblr, watch movies and tv shows, read books and fanfiction, write, Tumblr

[2] family;
1. are your parents still together?: Yup.
2. how old are your siblings, if you have any?: 26-30, I think?
3. are you the tallest one in your family?: I think my brother.
4. do you have the same name as one of your relatives?: No.
5. how many letters are there in your last name?: 7

[3] friends;
1. do you have a lot of friends?: Kinda.
2. what do you guys do when you’re together?: Hang out at the mall or someone’s place
3. have you ever lost a friend because of something stupid?: Yeah.
4. have you made any new friends this year?: Yes.
5. who’s the last friend you hung out with?: A classmate.

[4] your best friend(s);

1. how’d you meet him/her?: At school during the first grade.
2. do you live near each other?: Yes.
3. how long have you been best friends?: More than 10 years now, I think.
4. do you tell him/her everything?: Yes.
5. would you do anything for them?: Depends.

[5] boyfriend/girlfriend; (skip if single…)
1. How long have you liked this person?: 
2. How long have you been going out?: 
3. Who asked who out?: 
4. Do you love him/her?: 
5. Do you think you’ll be together forever?: 

[6] single life; (skip if taken…) 
1. how long have you been single?: Since September 2013.
2. who ended your last relationship?: I did.
3. do you wish you were in a relationship?: Sometimes.
4. as of today, do you like anyone?: Yes Luke Hemmings
5. if so, do you think it’ll go anywhere?: Lol no he doesn’t even know me

[7] who’s;
1. a person you’d travel across the country to see?: Family.
2. someone you would do anything for?: Family and best friends.
3. someone you’d die for?: Family.
4. a person you’ve known for your entire life?: My family.
5. your favorite person?: My best friend.

[8] have you ever;
1. sang a solo in front of a large audience?: Yes.
2. been in trouble with the cops?: Yes.
4. kicked a guy in the junk?: Nope.
5. pretended to be happy?: Always.

[9] do you believe;
1. in god?: Yes.
2. in satan?: Yes.
3. that everything happens for a reason?: Sorta.
4. in love at first sight?: Yes.
5. that there’s such a thing as true love?: kinda

[10] school; (skip if you work…)
1. what grade are you in?: I’m a Sophomore in college.
2. do you get good grades?: Yeah.
3. are you the teacher’s pet?: No.
4. have you ever been sent to the principal’s office?: Yeah, when I was in the third grade.
5. do you plan on going to college?: I’m in college.

[11] work; (skip if you don’t have a job…) 
1. how long have you been working at your job?
2. what do you do there?
3. what’s your favorite part about it?
4. is your boss a pain in the ass?
5. do you think you’ll work there your entire life?:

[12] pets;

1. what was your first pet’s name?: Keeper.
2. do you currently have any pets?:  Three dogs.
3. do you always remember to feed/water them?: Yeah.
4. have you ever had a pet fish?: No.
5. what’s the strangest animal you’ve had for a pet?: A huge ass rat?

[13] last time you…;
1. told someone you loved them?: Hours ago.
2. had sex?: 5 months ago.
3. drove a car?: Haven’t driven one yet.
4. went to burger king?: I can’t remember.
5. made someone cry?: A week ago?

[14] yesterday; 
1. what did you do?: Nothing
2. was it a good day?: Uh huh.
3. did you hang out with any friends?: No
4. did you get in any trouble?: No
5. was it better than today?: No

[15] today;
1. what day is it?: Monday
2. did you do anything fun?: No
3. did you have to work?: I don’t work
4. where did you go?: Nowhere
5. what are you doing tonight?: Watching True Blood
 and rewriting notes

- Name: Chandra
- Eye Color: Brown
- Hair Style/Color: Wavy, mid-length, dyed red
- Height: Short because I don’t know what my height is in numbers
- Clothing style: Casual and comfortable
- Best physical feature: Lips

- Your fears: Blood, closed spaces
- Your guilty pleasure: The Twilight Saga and Fifty Shades trilogy
- Ambitions for the future: Become a psychiatrist/Marry Luke Hemmings

- Your first thoughts waking up: What am I going to do today
- What you think about most: Luke Hemmings
- What you think about before bed: A shit ton of stuff but mostly Luke Hemmings
- You think your best quality is: I’m passionate

- Single or group dates: Single
- To be loved or respected: To be loved
- Beauty or brains: Brains
- Dogs or cats: Dogs

- Lie: Yes
- Believe in yourself: Yes
- Believe in love: Yes
- Want someone: Yes

- Been on stage: Yes, a ton of times already
- Done drugs: No and not ever
- Changed who you were to fit in: Nope

- Favorite color: Red
- Favorite animal: Dog
- Favorite movie: The Fault in Our Stars
- Favorite game: The Sims

- Day your next birthday will be: Saturday
- How old will you be: 19
- Age you lost your virginity: 17
- Does age matter: Depends

- Best personality: Romantic and adventurous
- Best eye color: Blue
- Best hair color: Blonde
- Best thing to do with a partner: Do everything and nothing and have sex of course lol

- I love: Luke Hemmings
- I feel: sick
- I hide: a lot of things
- I miss: my sister
- I wish: Luke Hemmings knew who I was